Stupid Mannequins

Yesterday I’m in a mall, to pick up a prescription when I look through the windows of one of the many shops and I see nude chrome mannequins. Now I’ve never liked those things, even as a kid I would have nightmare about the damn things, but now they’re making them headed and out of chrome?

I wanted to take a picture but I figured that security would ban me from the mall for taking pictures of naked mannequins, and wouldn’t that be something to explain to my mom and dad when they come to visit. “Sorry mom, I’m banned from that mall because I took pictures of naked mannequins.

So here’s my theory. These are suppose to be headless fembots, and when dressed, everyone will want to wear those clothes, because the look good with the gold or silver chrome of the mannequins. Maybe people are less offended by naked chrome mannequins as opposed to naked flesh coloured mannequins. While I did seem to like the way that the mannequin’s boobs were shaped, I did feel safe knowing that there weren’t any nipples on the things. I’ve sorry, but seeing hard nipples on mannequins freaks me out. I don’t need to see a horny mannequin who’s ready to party.

The more I think about it, the safer I feel about chrome mannequins. They’re less human and don’t threaten me as a result. Besides, I’m pretty sure that they’re plastic and I could easily smash them if they attacked. The wooden flesh coloured ones would be more of a threat.

Hopefully this is a sign of things to come. The rise of the nippleless chrome plastic mannequins; and the fall of the freaky flesh coloured nipple bearing wooden mannequins. I feel better already.

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Tales from the Great White North is Literature

It’s a new day…or some crap like that. I find myself lost for words right now. I’m not sure what to blog about so I’ve decided to wing it. Wing it has produced many great posts, such as the nipples on mannequins post to many other depraved works of literature. Is a blog post literature?

So I’ve looked up literature using the “lookup function” in Word and the first definition I get is “written works with artistic value” then it goes on abut drama, fiction…blaa blaa blaa, and it ends that it has to be “recognized as having important or permanent artistic value”. Recognized by whom I ask? By some snobby old guy with a lot of old books like the guy who hosts Masterpiece Theatre? I admit that the rant about the guy in the business suit in front of me at Safeway might not be considered literature, but the Bad Catholic post came from my heart as well as my mind. So Old Buzzards, stay away from my blog. You and your snobbish ways are not welcome here.

Then I looked at the second definition, “body of written works” and then it goes on “the body of written works of a culture, language, people or period of time” and give the example of Russian literature. So snobby old coots with big ass libraries be damned, my blog is now literature. It can be defined as “Canadian Literature” or better yet, “Early Blogosphere Literature”. In fact I now embrace that title. Tales from the Great White North is now Blogosphere Literature. WOOT. Now I feel a need to enjoy a Cappuccino, and act all fancy and snobby at a Starbucks or Second Cup.

Actually this feels like a shallow victory. I was hoping that I would have to fight for my right to have my blog labeled “Literature”, but it was just handed to me. This is no fun winning this easy, then again it beats hours of begging (not that I beg, I never beg, I mean never mind).

Awhile back I remember blogging about an online friend who is a published author. It was a work of fiction and there was a point in the book where they were talking about Werewolves shitting all over the living room, so I think I this blog can be defined as literature.

The remaining problem is that you can't take my blog to the bathroom to read, but then again, that might be a good thing

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Ouch

So I had a week off. It was nice to get away from the main job, though I still did the weekend job, but still. 5 days off isn’t a bad thing. Anyway I’m back and things are as usual. BLEECH.

So today I’m using a box cutter to open a box and OUCH. I cut my finger…again. Let me explain. I have a history of cutting my finger with this knife, from little cuts to removing of flesh from my finger. This knife has a thirst for blood, my blood and somehow I think that the knife’s thirst will ever be quenched. So today I’m wearing a band aid.

Actually it’s a good thing that I work for a pharmaceutical wholesaler. That way there are always bandages, Polysporin, and all that other stuff. The problem is that my injuries always seem to come from “that knife”

At home I have sharps things, including a meat cleaver but I never hurt myself on those things, I only hurt myself on that stupid box cutter knife.

Maybe I have the Vampire Box Cutter in my desk and I don’t realize it. Perhaps it’s collecting enough blood to be used in a ceremony to bring forth the Anti-Christ. Perhaps I’m being clutzy.

Either way, once again, I have a boo boo on one of my fingers.

Me Time

So I've decided the take the week off. It was getting to the point that even the little things were really starting to piss me off. It felt like doing anything, was a living hell, including updating the blog, (and I enjoy doing this). So it's Wednesday and I've come to the conclusion that I really don't want to go back to that job, ever, but alas, I need to find something new. Oh and I didn't the the job I interviewed for a week ago.

The problem now is that since I've been spending the week goofing off, I really dpn't have much to write about except... IKEA.

Yesterday,I took a trip to IKEA to buy a mini computer desk. I sold my old computer desk before I moved and my plan was to buy a big ass plasma TV and use it as a computer monitor and buy a wireless keyboard and do all my computer stuff from my couch. Well I never bought the TV, and I got tired of the temporary arrangement where I had my computer, so I bought a 30 IKEA desk, put it together and set it up at the end of my couch, so now I can sit comfortably on my couch as I use my PC to blog, work on the site, watch vidoes, or whatever. Bottom line, I'm happy and comfy.

I did have one problem though. I didn't want to leave IKEA. I love everything about IKEA. I wish I have a monster gift card and I would redecorate my place IKEA STYLE. I can picture it now, new dining room table, new couch, new chair, new bed, and all the cool little nick nacks that they have there. Most of my dishes, and cutlery are IKEA (except for the stuff the my mommy and daddy game me). There' just something right about IKEA, right down to the 99 cent breakfasts at their restaurant.

As for the coments from people who didn't know what Battlestar Galatica was... ***sigh***.

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I took one of those online quizes

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