Monday, December 27, 2004

I really hate Mannequins

I was walking through the mall again today and I noticed the mannequins with all their fashionable clothes and I remembered something. I really hate the damn things. People put them in these stupid poses, wearing new clothes and they usually have that "pissed off" look that models have when they walk down the runway.

Has anyone taken the time to look at the faces of the models when they walk down the runway? Probably not, because everyone is thinking "ohhh what nice clothes, " or "ohhh what a hottie", or even "those clothes suck" but if you were to look at the expression on their faces, you could tell that the models are pissed off at something. Perhaps the guy who tells them to go pinched their asses or something. I don't know. All I know is that models always look pissed off.

So now we have inanimate objects looking pissed off as well. I really need to have dummies wearing nicer clothes than me, not to mention being in better shape than me, giving me a look that says "I'm better than you". I don't need that attitude from a piece of wood. It really got me annoyed when I was walking around and I saw a bench and those friggin dummies were sitting on it. What if an old person needed to sit down but now this person couldn't because of these pieces of wood with nice clothes and that arrogant smirk on their faces were sitting there. When did lumber have priority seating at the mall over humans?

I've always wanted to go into a store with a bat and just beat the crap out of all the mannequins. I can imagine the look on everyone's faces as I walk into the men's department and start smashing them in the face first, and then the mid section until all the body parts were in pieces. I would then go to the women's department and do the same and finally the kids sections. Even the child mannequins looked creepy.

Now everyone is wondering why I have this screw loose when it comes to mannequins so now its confession time. Even as a kid, I never liked the damn things. When I was young, I had this fear that if I got locked into a store and they turned the lights out, that the mannequins would come to life and come after me and then they would turn me into one as well and I would be forced to spend the rest of my life, standing motionless in a department store for the rest of my life. I was a kid and I now know that it was my imagination running wild but I still don't like the things.

Oh yeah, who decided that mannequins should have nipples now? Is it really necessary for mannequins to have them? Why do I need to see a female mannequin in a tight t-shirt with erect nipples? What purpose does it serve? Does it show that the store is cold and a t-shirt isn't enough to wear or are the mannequins sexually aroused now?

Yeah that's it; they're trying to charm someone to stay with them until the lights go out and BAM, just like my fear as a child. Mannequins don't need to have hard nipples.

Next thing you know, your going to have mannequins with cleavage and jiggling implants and men will get arrested for fondling them. ENOUGH with the mannequins, and wipe that smirk of their faces.

My 2 bytes

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