These people have to be twisted

Earlier tonight, I was chatting with someone online and they sent me a link to the most disturbing sex toy I have ever seen. It was basically all the sexual organs of a female with the tip of a man at the end of it. WHO COMES UP WITH THIS STUFF?

I must admit that I'm a prude in real life, but also a closet pervert so I do know a thing or two about "toys". I mean if any of you claim that you've never once looked at pornography online, then you're LYING.

Now thinking about this whole industry, I realized that there's a lot of money involved and there has to be a lot of people in the process. I want to be in the boardroom of one of these companies. I want to listen in on these conversations. It would go something like this. "Sales on the Pocket Pussy are up 15% while sales on the Mighty Dong are only up 5%. How are the numbers on the Butt Plugs?" How could anyone keep a straight face through all that?

Another thing, WHO NAMES THIS STUFF? Let's see we have the Concubine Masturbator (I'm not linking any of this. Fine it yourself), the Eurasion Dong 3, or the ever popular (so I hear) the Rampant Rabbit. Then again I think it's the same people naming candy bars, like "Mr. Big" and "Oh Henry". I mean come on.

One thing I also noticed is that some the artificial women's organs are based in a real woman (a porno star). What I want to know is how can they be sure that it's accurate? Do they get her to sit in a mold or something? Do they get a guy to test it and compare it to the real thing?

That's another thing, who do they get to test these things? Is there one guy who comes into work and "tests" the prototypes and writes a report? "I felt a little pinching and chaffing towards the tip. Perhaps we can increase the diameter." Then he has to go home and his wife asks him how was work? Oh and is this the same guy who's taste testing the flavored condoms? I wonder if Banana is the most popular flavor.

Oh and who comes up with all these glow in the dark colors for condom and even dildos? Some of these things look like that they should be strapped to the wing on an airplane and used as running light? Are people looking for bright red toys? Do they need to glow in the dark? Did the power go out and you need something to light the room?

Oh and I'm not going to say anything about fur covered handcuffs other than they exist along with a lot of other creepy leather stuff. I want a hug from my lover not to be forced to wear a leather mask.

One other thing. If you're a woman and claim sexual harassment, how the hell are you going to prove it? "Your honor I was discussing our new line of vibrators" and it would be a valid argument.

Some people do enjoy these devices as they can add something to someone's sex life but what's wrong with cuddling and small kisses down someone's back?

My 2 bytes