Wednesday, January 30, 2008

I’ve been sick for a few days so I didn’t blog, or visit blogs, but I’m back now.

Recently, while I reading someone’s blog (and they know who they are), I came across (ok not the best choice of works), a couple of paragraphs about Astroglide. Now I “know” what this product is, but the name of this product is so innocent. To me it sounds like the name of a floor wax for making your floors really shiny. I have image of a 50’s sexist commercial with a tacky jingle ending with a bell going “DING” at the same time the “home maker” smiles and a star like effect comes with the smile, but that’s not what it’s for, you know it, and I know it. It’s for women to use when men don’t understand that foreplay is more than dirty talking and a couple of nipple twists (THERE I SAID IT).

So I did some research and went to their website. I noticed that even their bottle is smooth and curvy. Men like smooth and curvy, so I like the bottle, but did you know that you could get FREE SAMPLES! I didn't know that but why would I want free samples? (HEY!! DON'T THINK LIKE THAT SO SICK PERVS)

As a continued my research, I discovered that there's a strawberry scented version of the product. So her CENSORED can smell like strawberries, cool. Oh and there's t-shirts and sweaters with the Astroglide name and logo. So wearing these clothes will the tell everyone that when you CENSORED, you use Astroglide.

As I read through the site, I realized that “dryness” isn't always the man's fault (THANK GOD, but it didn't mentioned headache as one of the reasons, strange). There's some Health related information there, so these guys appear to be responsible.

I did find a “fun page” and there was a game where you're a little white guy shooting stuff. (I'm not reading anything into this), Though I did loose interest after the first level, so this might be something bad.

I've decided that I think that the name Astroglide is a great name for this product. While it's a little vague, it is family friendly. (I'm talking to you Wondercum), If the Wondercum people made this product I'm sure they would have called it something nasty like Pussylube. Oh and if it's ever in my home and my mom find it, I'll tell her it's for the floors.

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