Tuesday, February 20, 2007

21 Naughty Bytes

Alright the last post was lame but I just found this and this cries for commentary from yours truly so here I go. Oh and I discovered this here.

  1. According to the Kinsey Institute, the biggest erect penis on record measures 13 inches. The smallest tops off at 1 3/4 inches.

Wouldn’t that suck (no pun intended) to be the guy with the smallest ‘deal’. He’s the guy sitting in the corner of the bar mumbling, “Size doesn’t matter my ass”.

  1. The most common fantasy is oral sex

I could make a nasty comment but now that I think of it, this makes sense, there’s something …naughty about it (I was going to say presidential but that joke’s been done too many times).

  1. 8% of us have regular anal sex.

And 92% of us say “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING”

  1. 60% of men and 54% of women have had a 1-night stand.

And 6% have had more than one. Do the math people.

  1. Women buy 4 out of every 10 condoms sold.

Once I bought the “Today Sponge”, you should have seen the look at got from the cashier. (I was indeed Spongeworthy)

  1. In 1609, a doctor named Wecker found a corpse in Bologna with two penises. Since then, there have been eighty documented cases of men similarly endowed.

These are the guys who are dating the 8%.

  1. Men say the average erect penis is 10″. Women say it’s 4″.

Women don’t count balls. Men do.

  1. A female orgasm is a powerful painkiller (because of the release of endorphins), so headaches are in fact a bad excuse not to have sex.

Hallelujah !!!!!!!!!!

  1. 56% of men have had sex at work.

I’m sorry but masturbation in the bathroom does not count.

  1. Among the Mangaians of Polynesia, 18-year-old couples make love
    an average of three times a night, every night, until their
    thirties, when the weekly average drops to a mere 14.

Where do I sing up to be a Mangaian?

  1. 1 in 3 of us have had an extramarital affair.

I’m single and have always been so it’s not me

  1. 62% think there is nothing wrong with affairs.

That depends if you’re the one being cheated on

  1. The maximum speed at which erotic sensations travel from skin to
    brain has been clocked at 156 miles per hour.

I want to know how they timed this, and who were the test subjects. Also how do I become a test subject.

  1. A honeymooning couple are suing Holiday Inn for ten thousand
    dollars, claiming their sex life is now dysfunction because an
    employee mistakenly walked in on them on their wedding night.

Was he carrying a videocamera?

  1. At least 500 Americans die each year from asphyxia in an attempt
    to lessen oxygen flow to the brain in order to induce a more
    powerful orgasm.

I think I saw this movie.

  1. England’s King Edward VII, a man of considerable heft, had a
    special table built so that he could comfortably engage in
    sexual intercourse.

Two options. Let her get on top or LOOSE SOME WEIGHT

  1. 29% of us are virgins when we marry.

Forget the virgin, I wanna marry a slut. She knows what’s she’s doing.

  1. The average sexual experience lasts about 39 minutes.

38 minutes of begging, 1 minute of sex.

  1. 58% like dirty talk during sex.

What else are you suppose to do? Ask how your day went?

  1. 22% rent porno flicks at least once.

And 78% are liars.

  1. Given today’s average frequency of sexual intercourse, it would
    take the typical American couple more than four years to try
    every one of the 529 positions described in the Kama Sutra.

Ok I’m now taking applications to try this out.

My 2 Bytes

No comments: