Talking Jesus Action Figure

I just read that Wal-Mart in the U.S. has sold out of Talking Jesus Action Figures. I didn’t even know that they sold Talking Jesus Action Figures. Do we need a Talking Jesus Action Figure? At first I thought that these guys should be ashamed of themselves for selling such a product, and exploiting the son of God in that way. Then, the more I thought about it, I thought I wish I had one when I was a kid.

The first thing I thought was, does he have a Kung Fu grip? A talking Jesus with a Kung Fu grip would rock. Then with his Kung Fu grip, he could battle my Chuck Norris Karate Commando Action Figure. Chuck Norris vs. The Jesus? This would be a bigger battle than when Chuck fought Bruce Lee in Return of the Dragon.

Then I thought that Jesus could hang out in the General Lee with Bo and Luke Duke. He could be in the back of the General Lee, preaching to Bo and Luke, while the General jumps over Rosco's police car. He could also be in the back of B.A Van from the A-Team, trying to convince Murdoch that he's not insane, or maybe he could sit shotgun, in Kitt and he and Michael could exchange hair secrets.

Jesus has all the answers since he's the son of God, so he should also be able to help out Scully and Mulder. Mulder is looking for “The Truth” and who else would know the truth other than Jesus.

What would be really cool, is substituting Jesus for other action figures, imagine, reenacting the LightSabre fight in Empire Strikes back and have Jesus play Luke. Having Darth Vader telling Jesus that he was Jesus's father (Ok I'm in BIG TROUBLE NOW). Jesus looking his hand (there goes the Kung Fu grip).

Oh and I'm not the first one who ever thought about stuff like this either, I remember SOMEONE did a blog post about Jesus hanging out with Super Girl and Wonder Woman, so I'm not going to be alone when I burn in hell.

Anyway, the Jesus action figure is sold out, but I hear there are a lot of Moses's left, which is good, because i want one. He would look great in my bathroom. He could “part the waters” of my toilet whenever I flush it.

My 2 Bytes